America’s New Concern for Fuel Economy
Over the past decade, consumers have begun to show an increasing interest in the fuel economy of their cars. This is evident from records of truck and sport utility vehicle sales compared to compact and hybrid car sales in recent times. This trend in America’s yearning for higher gas mileage sparked a change in driving habits that allows for more efficient fuel use. There are also countless sources comparing many makes and models in the area of fuel economy.
The trend in consumers’ desire for more fuel efficient vehicles has been affecting vehicle production. Manufacturers are offering a wider variety of fuel efficient cars now than in previous decades. Today Toyota offers eight fuel efficient models and had only half that just ten years prior. (EPA, 1998) Nissan offers an affordable vehicle boasting a 34 MPG highway rating starting at under $10,000. Every major manufacturer offers a vehicle with fuel economy of 35 MPG or more. General Motors developed a compression and ignition system in 2007 to burn fuel with 15 percent better fuel economy because of this demand.
The fall of sport utility vehicle and truck sales is an occurrence that can be associated with America’s new concern for fuel economy. January through April brought a 32 percent decrease in SUV sales. (Lawrence) During those same few months, hybrid sales have risen 25 percent. (Zimmerman) General Motors said its truck and SUV sales dropped 27 percent from April 2007-08(Durbin), while small car sales are almost 19 percent higher. (Abelson) Some dealerships are giving less for sport utility vehicle trade-ins. There are even some dealers that are refusing to take gas guzzlers for trade-ins. A used car dealer, Ivan Hoyos says, “Nobody is buying used SUVs…The truth is, more and more dealers are staying away from used SUVs and large trucks — It doesn't pay.”
Following this quest for better gas mileage, over half the U.S. is taking steps to reduce the gas consumption by their vehicles or have considered buying a more fuel efficient car. (Saad) This is leading to an abundant amount of sources comparing gas mileage of vehicles or listing steps to become a more fuel efficient driver. Currently, there are over 2.5million websites offering their list of the “10 most fuel efficient cars.” There are even people called “hypermilers” who are committed to covering the greatest distance from their gas. (Woodyard) These hybrid drivers over inflate tires, coast to stops, and tailgate to gain precious MPG. There are many organizations and forums dedicated to helping them share tips for lowering fuel consumption.
One cause of this newly found fuel consciousness is the cost of gasoline. Ten years ago, in 1998, regular grade gasoline sold for $1.03 per gallon. (Taylor, Von Doren) With inflation considered, that has been the lowest selling price of this commodity for almost half a century. Between January and September of 2008 gasoline couldn’t be purchased for under $3.00 per gallon throughout most of our country. In some parts of the country, gasoline was reported to have cost $4.00 per gallon during the early summer. These numbers have sparked a fear of even higher prices in some Americans. After the passing SUV craze, people are trying to trade in their gas-guzzlers for fuel-sipping Hybrids and compacts cars.
An additional cause of Americans seeking more fuel efficient vehicles is tax incentives. The IRS now offers tax breaks of several thousands of dollars for owner of hybrid vehicles. (DOE, 2005) Owners of the popular Toyota Prius can expect a $3000 tax credit, but vehicles with greater fuel consumption like the Chevrolet Silverado Hybrid will only earn owners an average of $250 though it possesses fuel conserving electric components.
Yet another reason many Americans are making the switch to high mileage vehicles is concern for our environment. Hybrid cars use electricity as well as gasoline for propulsion. This greatly reduces the amount of harmful chemicals that are in their exhaust. Those who are genuinely concerned with global consequences of human behavior are the consumers that jump at the chance to purchase a practical vehicle with low emissions. On average, hybrid cars only produce one-fifth of the harmful greenhouse gases and air pollutants that similar gasoline cars expel. (Hybrid Car Org. 2004)
Stemming from a long period of steadily rising gasoline prices, tax incentives, and environmental concerns, consciousness of fuel efficiency has become a trend among Americans. This has affected vehicle sales and production. It also gave cause for drivers to evaluate their driving habits. Despite the present leveling off of fuel costs, fuel economy concerns have become too widespread to disappear overnight.
Works Cited
Abelson, Jenn. "Frustrated owners try to unload their guzzlers." The Boston Globe 06 May 2008. 2 Dec. 2008 .
Durbin, Dee-Ann. "SUV and Truck Sales Plunge." The Washington Post 02 May 2008: D2. 30 Nov. 2008 .
Kintisch, Eli. "Physicists Support Conservation of Energy." Science 321 (2008): 1621. EBSCO Host. 1 Dec. 2008 .
Lawrence, Chris. "SUVs plunge toward 'endangered' list." CNN . 23 May 2008. CNN. 30 Nov. 2008 .
Taylor, Jerry and Von Doren, Peter . "Gasoline Prices in Perspective." Investor's Business Daily 17 May 2006. Individual Liberty, Free Markets, Peace. CATO Institute. 30 Nov. 2008 .
Vlasic, Bill. "As Gas Costs Soar, Buyers Flock to Small Cars." The New York Times 2 May 2008. The New York Times. 2 May 2008. 30 Nov. 2008 .
Woodyard, Chris. "100 mpg? For 'hypermilers,' that sounds about right." USA Today 27 June 2008. 2 Dec. 2008 .
"New Energy Tax Credits For Hybrids." Fuel economy. 31 Dec. 2005. United States Department of Energy. 30 Nov. 2008 .
"Model Year 1998 Fuel Economy Guide." Fuel Economy. Environmental Protection Agency. 30 Nov. 2008.
"Subcompact and Compact Cars." 2008. J.D. Power and Associates. 30 Nov. 2008 .
"SUV trade-ins no longer welcome." Washington Times 28 Apr. 2008. 28 Apr. 2008. 1 Dec. 2008 .
**post write**
I am very pleased with my conclusion. It sums up everything I have stated in the piece. Am feeling a lot better about the introduction now that it only states evidence suggesting the trend exists. It no longer goes in all directions. I am also liking the choice to put the effects of the trend before the causes. Again, I now know the importance of proving the trend exists and conveying a clear main idea of the piece right away.
Do you think I should take out the quote? It is by an "average Joe," but someone closely tied to the subject.
Is this piece harmed by having all those figures in text and not in a chart or graph? I don't want to have to read more sources to make a graph fit in. It justs sounds like I'd have to start at square one again.
Is this piece still too short?
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
Monday, November 24, 2008
Annotating a Scholarly Article (revised)
Grieve, Frederick G., and Crystal M. Bonneau-Kaya. "Weight loss and muscle building content in popular magazines oriented toward women and men." North American Journal of Psychology 9.1 (March 2007): 97. Academic OneFile. Gale. Bristol Community College. 24 Nov. 2008 .
In the article authors, Frederick Grieve and Crystal Bonneau-Kaya, write of a study of popular magazines geared toward each sex. They were to examine two hypotheses. The first was that women’s magazines will have more advertisements and articles about weight loss than those intended for men. The second was that magazines intended for men will have more ads and articles regarding weight gain than those marketed toward women. Grieve and Bonneau-Kaya write that in this study, people unaware of its purpose were to count the number of articles and ads that met conditions for being either associated with weight loss or weight gain. The authors, leaders of the study, decided that to be associated with weight loss an article must contain phrases like “weight reduction,” “low carb,” or “slimmer.” For an ad to be considered associated with weight gain it must contain a phrase similar to “toning,” “weight lifting,” or “muscle building.” According to Grieve and Bonneau-Kaya, the results of the blind study supported the two hypotheses.
This article was published in March of 2007, making it recent and relevant. This article read very easily. Containing no psychology terms, it was readable for all audiences. The results of the study seem impartial because the raters of the magazines didn’t know what their findings were to support or disprove. The authors of the article Weight loss and muscle building content in popular magazines oriented toward women and men were Frederick G. Grieve and Crystal M. Bonneau-Kaya. A lot of the sources were also written by Grieve. This reflects him being an expert in this area of study. He is part of the Department of Psychology at the Western Kentucky University. Bonneau-Kaya was a psychology major minoring in women studies at the same university, giving her great background on the subject. One of the sources cited in this article was published by the American Psychology Association, making it a credible source. To find magazines that were “popular” the authors referenced the Audit Bureau of Circulation which is the standard for media audits.
**post write**
I think that the summary is the best I could do without taking the words form the authors. It remained unchanged as I completed my second draft. I feel it is clear exactly what has been done. I really like the paragraph examining the credibility of the authors and their sources. I bothered to “google” the authors and works they cited. I even visited the website for the university’s Dept. of Psychology. Overall, I think that I have fulfilled the expectations of this assignment.
In the article authors, Frederick Grieve and Crystal Bonneau-Kaya, write of a study of popular magazines geared toward each sex. They were to examine two hypotheses. The first was that women’s magazines will have more advertisements and articles about weight loss than those intended for men. The second was that magazines intended for men will have more ads and articles regarding weight gain than those marketed toward women. Grieve and Bonneau-Kaya write that in this study, people unaware of its purpose were to count the number of articles and ads that met conditions for being either associated with weight loss or weight gain. The authors, leaders of the study, decided that to be associated with weight loss an article must contain phrases like “weight reduction,” “low carb,” or “slimmer.” For an ad to be considered associated with weight gain it must contain a phrase similar to “toning,” “weight lifting,” or “muscle building.” According to Grieve and Bonneau-Kaya, the results of the blind study supported the two hypotheses.
This article was published in March of 2007, making it recent and relevant. This article read very easily. Containing no psychology terms, it was readable for all audiences. The results of the study seem impartial because the raters of the magazines didn’t know what their findings were to support or disprove. The authors of the article Weight loss and muscle building content in popular magazines oriented toward women and men were Frederick G. Grieve and Crystal M. Bonneau-Kaya. A lot of the sources were also written by Grieve. This reflects him being an expert in this area of study. He is part of the Department of Psychology at the Western Kentucky University. Bonneau-Kaya was a psychology major minoring in women studies at the same university, giving her great background on the subject. One of the sources cited in this article was published by the American Psychology Association, making it a credible source. To find magazines that were “popular” the authors referenced the Audit Bureau of Circulation which is the standard for media audits.
**post write**
I think that the summary is the best I could do without taking the words form the authors. It remained unchanged as I completed my second draft. I feel it is clear exactly what has been done. I really like the paragraph examining the credibility of the authors and their sources. I bothered to “google” the authors and works they cited. I even visited the website for the university’s Dept. of Psychology. Overall, I think that I have fulfilled the expectations of this assignment.
Sunday, November 9, 2008
Proposal (revised)
This would be addressed to the student senate, or the whole student body.
Attending Bristol Community College , you are aware of the various costs students are burdened with. We all have to pay tuition and college fees, maintain health insurance, and purchase books for each class. These expenses can add up pretty quickly and become overwhelming for some of us.
When receiving credits after completing courses, we suddenly become okay with the money we have spent. Then we sell our used books back to the campus bookstore for about 20 percent of their original cost. The bookstore turns around and sells our used textbooks to another student for a significant amount more than what they gave us. This is how our economy works, but it is unfair.
According to MassPIRG, a Government Accountability Office report last year found that, making up over 25% of college expenses, textbook prices have risen at twice the rate of inflation for the past 20 years. In The Daily Collegian, Phil Olsen, director of the Textbook Annex at UMASS, was quoted saying, “Each year students spend close to $6 (million) on books and receive about $1.2 (million) in return.” Students at UMASS are only receiving one-fifth of their initial textbook investment back. We deserve better. We need to stick together and stop this profiteering glutton we call our campus bookstore from profiting from our used books. (Pardi)
Students at our school need to be given the opportunity to sell their books directly to other students. We need to stop giving the campus bookstore a chance to make money from our used books. One may ask how this could be made possible. My answer is simple: Very easily.
I propose the start of a textbook exchange week in G Building a couple weeks prior to the start of each semester. This would allow students to sell used books directly to others without the mark-up of the bookstore.
The textbook exchange week would play out with one day for science and health career textbooks, one day for mathematics books, one day for business and English books, a day for history and the arts (also other electives), and Friday being a day for everything that has not yet been sold. There would be a table set up for every course with a sign to indicate the course’s title. This would ensure that students find what they are looking for.
Any student eager to see the benefits of this plan can volunteer to help set up this event. About twenty minutes would be all that is required to set up tables and tape signs to the front of them. This could be achieved with 2-5 students working together. I will have no problem being one of them because I know an event such as this will benefit many students and is well worth the minute effort.
The selling student would set the price they will let their book go for. Due to a large number of students wanting to sell and purchase the same book, prices would remain relatively similar. To allow each party to make out with a great deal, the set prices would be somewhere between the amount the campus bookstore sells the used text for and what it will purchase the book for. This is possible this because we would cut out the extremely high mark-up of the campus bookstore, allowing the seller to make more money and the buyer to pay less simultaneously.
This is a great plan because it requires very little organization and zero funding. The cafeteria in G Building is large enough to host this event. Our school could provide the tables needed. This could be completely student run; no staff would need to aid us or even be present.
Unfortunately this plan would benefit some students more than others. Due to the fact that every transaction would be on a cash basis, any student relying on a book advance from financial aid could not participate in the buying part of this event. They could still put their used books up for sale and possibly receive more than the campus bookstore would offer them. Also, after a few years of being in effect, there would be a great reduction in used books available through the bookstore because every student would want to sell their books to the highest paying customer, another student.
The whole student body would benefit from an event like this prior to each semester. Each student would receive more for their old books and pay less for their courses? required texts. There is no need for the campus bookstore to profit off our used textbooks. A student selling directly to another student would allow direct transfer of cash, with a student receiving the whole amount of the purchase price for their used text. Not one student could argue that this plan is not best for all.
Works Cited
"Beacon Hill to Lower Textbook Costs / unknown." MASSPIRG. 2008. Massachusetts Student Public Interest Research Group. 9 Nov. 2008 http://www.masspirgstudents.org/masspirg-in-the-news/masspirg-in-the-news/beacon-hill-to-lower-textbook-costs.
Pardi, Lauren / Collegian Correspondent, . "SGA tries to solve textbook costs problem." The Daily Collegian. 14 May 2007.College Publisher.9 Nov. 2008.
Post Write
I really don’t know what is working for me here. The only things I have going for me is I believe what I am proposing is the best solution for the problem. I am glad I found an article that relates to, not only the price of textbooks, but the difference in the original prices and what bookstores are willing to purchase books back for. I like my plan being as detailed as it is.
I am still a little unsure of the revision that took out the part of splitting the difference in the bookstore’s prices to set the new price of books. I think that allowing students to haggle would cause some drama at the event. I did make the change for the simple fact that, though its employees are student, this plan cannot rely on the bookstore, which will be losing business, for cooperation.
Do you think letting the students set their prices will make things run more smoothly or bring some chaos?
Would you participate in this event if proposal was accepted?
Attending Bristol Community College , you are aware of the various costs students are burdened with. We all have to pay tuition and college fees, maintain health insurance, and purchase books for each class. These expenses can add up pretty quickly and become overwhelming for some of us.
When receiving credits after completing courses, we suddenly become okay with the money we have spent. Then we sell our used books back to the campus bookstore for about 20 percent of their original cost. The bookstore turns around and sells our used textbooks to another student for a significant amount more than what they gave us. This is how our economy works, but it is unfair.
According to MassPIRG, a Government Accountability Office report last year found that, making up over 25% of college expenses, textbook prices have risen at twice the rate of inflation for the past 20 years. In The Daily Collegian, Phil Olsen, director of the Textbook Annex at UMASS, was quoted saying, “Each year students spend close to $6 (million) on books and receive about $1.2 (million) in return.” Students at UMASS are only receiving one-fifth of their initial textbook investment back. We deserve better. We need to stick together and stop this profiteering glutton we call our campus bookstore from profiting from our used books. (Pardi)
Students at our school need to be given the opportunity to sell their books directly to other students. We need to stop giving the campus bookstore a chance to make money from our used books. One may ask how this could be made possible. My answer is simple: Very easily.
I propose the start of a textbook exchange week in G Building a couple weeks prior to the start of each semester. This would allow students to sell used books directly to others without the mark-up of the bookstore.
The textbook exchange week would play out with one day for science and health career textbooks, one day for mathematics books, one day for business and English books, a day for history and the arts (also other electives), and Friday being a day for everything that has not yet been sold. There would be a table set up for every course with a sign to indicate the course’s title. This would ensure that students find what they are looking for.
Any student eager to see the benefits of this plan can volunteer to help set up this event. About twenty minutes would be all that is required to set up tables and tape signs to the front of them. This could be achieved with 2-5 students working together. I will have no problem being one of them because I know an event such as this will benefit many students and is well worth the minute effort.
The selling student would set the price they will let their book go for. Due to a large number of students wanting to sell and purchase the same book, prices would remain relatively similar. To allow each party to make out with a great deal, the set prices would be somewhere between the amount the campus bookstore sells the used text for and what it will purchase the book for. This is possible this because we would cut out the extremely high mark-up of the campus bookstore, allowing the seller to make more money and the buyer to pay less simultaneously.
This is a great plan because it requires very little organization and zero funding. The cafeteria in G Building is large enough to host this event. Our school could provide the tables needed. This could be completely student run; no staff would need to aid us or even be present.
Unfortunately this plan would benefit some students more than others. Due to the fact that every transaction would be on a cash basis, any student relying on a book advance from financial aid could not participate in the buying part of this event. They could still put their used books up for sale and possibly receive more than the campus bookstore would offer them. Also, after a few years of being in effect, there would be a great reduction in used books available through the bookstore because every student would want to sell their books to the highest paying customer, another student.
The whole student body would benefit from an event like this prior to each semester. Each student would receive more for their old books and pay less for their courses? required texts. There is no need for the campus bookstore to profit off our used textbooks. A student selling directly to another student would allow direct transfer of cash, with a student receiving the whole amount of the purchase price for their used text. Not one student could argue that this plan is not best for all.
Works Cited
"Beacon Hill to Lower Textbook Costs / unknown." MASSPIRG. 2008. Massachusetts Student Public Interest Research Group. 9 Nov. 2008 http://www.masspirgstudents.org/masspirg-in-the-news/masspirg-in-the-news/beacon-hill-to-lower-textbook-costs.
Pardi, Lauren / Collegian Correspondent, . "SGA tries to solve textbook costs problem." The Daily Collegian. 14 May 2007.College Publisher.9 Nov. 2008
Post Write
I really don’t know what is working for me here. The only things I have going for me is I believe what I am proposing is the best solution for the problem. I am glad I found an article that relates to, not only the price of textbooks, but the difference in the original prices and what bookstores are willing to purchase books back for. I like my plan being as detailed as it is.
I am still a little unsure of the revision that took out the part of splitting the difference in the bookstore’s prices to set the new price of books. I think that allowing students to haggle would cause some drama at the event. I did make the change for the simple fact that, though its employees are student, this plan cannot rely on the bookstore, which will be losing business, for cooperation.
Do you think letting the students set their prices will make things run more smoothly or bring some chaos?
Would you participate in this event if proposal was accepted?
Monday, October 20, 2008
News Story (revised)
This article would be appropriate for the Herald News.
Mini-golf Making a Difference
Grab a foursome and schedule a tee time. On October 24th Lazer Gate, 288 Plymouth Ave, Fall River, will be hosting a black light mini golf tournament with all proceeds benefiting the Jarvis Green Foundation.
The event will be held on Friday October 24th from 3-9p.m. Tickets cost $15 ($45/foursome) and are available in advance online at www.lazergate.com/tournament and www.turnto10.com keyword: Jarvis. They include 18 holes of golf, a hot dog, fries, and a small drink. Walk-ins are welcome, but those having tickets prior to the start of the event can avoid waiting and move to the front of the line. Qualifying rounds will take place from 3-8p.m. A final round at 8p.m. will only include qualifying players competing to win prizes. There will be members of event staff at every hole to ensure accurate scoring. Jarvis Green will be there from 5-9p.m. for the final round and is available for photos and autographs.
The grand prize is a 4 pack of Patriots tickets to a home game. The date of the game is still to be announced. Second prize is dinner with Jarvis Green. Third prize is an assortment of Patriots memorabilia. In addition to these prizes, there will be a raffle.
Lazer Gate’s 18 hole course is out of this world with the front 9’s outer space theme. It is complete with aliens and spacecrafts. A journey through the vortex, a walkway surrounded by rotating psychedelic walls, leaves you in prehistoric times. Sometimes a little startling, the dinosaurs and working volcano seem to come to life under the black lights. Despite the eye-opening artwork, this course is elementary with easily avoidable and mostly stationary obstacles.
When asked about his expectations, Steve Holbrook, course designer, says though few tickets have been sold as of this time he is hoping for a big turn out. He also says that Lazer Gate has wanted to host a charity event for some time.
The Jarvis Green Foundation is a not-for-profit organization that provides support to working single mothers in low-income areas. This is in expansion of there original mission to help single mothers who were victims of Hurricane Katrina. There will also be a cocktail party benefiting this organization at the Two Forty Two restaurant in Providence, RI the night before this event.
Mini-golf Making a Difference
Grab a foursome and schedule a tee time. On October 24th Lazer Gate, 288 Plymouth Ave, Fall River, will be hosting a black light mini golf tournament with all proceeds benefiting the Jarvis Green Foundation.
The event will be held on Friday October 24th from 3-9p.m. Tickets cost $15 ($45/foursome) and are available in advance online at www.lazergate.com/tournament and www.turnto10.com keyword: Jarvis. They include 18 holes of golf, a hot dog, fries, and a small drink. Walk-ins are welcome, but those having tickets prior to the start of the event can avoid waiting and move to the front of the line. Qualifying rounds will take place from 3-8p.m. A final round at 8p.m. will only include qualifying players competing to win prizes. There will be members of event staff at every hole to ensure accurate scoring. Jarvis Green will be there from 5-9p.m. for the final round and is available for photos and autographs.
The grand prize is a 4 pack of Patriots tickets to a home game. The date of the game is still to be announced. Second prize is dinner with Jarvis Green. Third prize is an assortment of Patriots memorabilia. In addition to these prizes, there will be a raffle.
Lazer Gate’s 18 hole course is out of this world with the front 9’s outer space theme. It is complete with aliens and spacecrafts. A journey through the vortex, a walkway surrounded by rotating psychedelic walls, leaves you in prehistoric times. Sometimes a little startling, the dinosaurs and working volcano seem to come to life under the black lights. Despite the eye-opening artwork, this course is elementary with easily avoidable and mostly stationary obstacles.
When asked about his expectations, Steve Holbrook, course designer, says though few tickets have been sold as of this time he is hoping for a big turn out. He also says that Lazer Gate has wanted to host a charity event for some time.
The Jarvis Green Foundation is a not-for-profit organization that provides support to working single mothers in low-income areas. This is in expansion of there original mission to help single mothers who were victims of Hurricane Katrina. There will also be a cocktail party benefiting this organization at the Two Forty Two restaurant in Providence, RI the night before this event.
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Assignment 3 Application Essay (revised)
Prompt: If you were to describe yourself by a quotation, what would the quote be?
Explain your answer. (Dartmouth)
A long time ago Oliver Wendell Holmes said, "A mind stretched to a new idea never returns to its original dimension." This statement remains true to this day. I feel I am living proof that the human mind will never think the same way once it is exposed to a new concept. Throughout my life, my perspectives on many things have changed dramatically. Every day my views are challenged and altered by the information I absorb.
Every time we learn something, we try to understand how hit fits into our everyday lives. We all look for practical applications of our knowledge, and to this I am no exception.
I was born into an English speaking household. Neither of my parents speak more than one language, and so naturally the language I thought in was English. In middle school I began taking French classes, which I continued to study in high school. I also took a semester of German. I spent over a year in Southern California, where the majority of the population was of Mexican heritage, and heard Spanish on a daily basis. Today when I see different objects or think of a phrase I am about to speak, I think in all the languages I know. I now know all titles for objects are synonymous and tend to look for similarities in the languages I have studied.
In my younger years I played sports with my brother, and we tried everything from football to boxing, soccer to sprinting. I believed this all to be in good fun. And then I began to learn a little about early civilizations. Sparking my interest were the barbaric activities in which they engaged. People would watch gladiators battle for their lives in enormous stadiums, sometimes against their fellow man, and others against beasts to which they stood no chance. In either case, what drew spectators in was the ability to see another human harmed. Now, the same sports I previously saw as childhood fun took on a new shape in my head. Boxing and all sports with physical contact became a way to fulfill our, still present, semi-barbaric desires.
I was a person that didn't think of the global consequences of my actions. I would applaud when I'd see an overgrown lot cleared of its trees to make way for a new shopping center. One day, I watched a video on the British industrial revolution. I saw the construction of factories and the progression of roadways. Diverse topographical features were replaced by dull man-made structures. I suddenly became more aware of the footprints we, as a whole, are leaving behind. Excitement about nature preservation replaced my desire for further city development.
Though Holmes had passed long ago, his words live on. "A mind stretched to a new idea never returns to its original dimension," is a saying that I hold true. Is there anything of existence that can be stretched and return exactly to its previous state? Every bit of information I am privileged enough to come across changes the way I think about the subject. As long as I can think, the way I feel about any subject is tangible.
***post write***
What I feel is working for me here is that I got to fit some of my educational background into a supporting detail. I also like the fact that I make myself sound like I have a desire to learn more and use what I have gathered. I think I chose a good quote that makes me appear worldly. The supporting info I chose wasn't personal, but still had to do with me.
I think it could be better with use of less elementary detail. I feel I could have written a hundred paragraphs under this intro.
Hey reader: Do you think this would be stronger with more examples?
Would telling how certain works (particularly stories like 2bro2b or A Brave New World... I can't leave out Galapagos which goes right along with my second example) have affected my views?
Monday, September 29, 2008
Talk Back Assignment 2 - This I Believe
I think I could still make this piece better, more stiking. I have looked for ways to add more colorful and powerful language to it. I am very pleased with the results of taking out all the mumbo jumbo with references to time and space (all worthlkess detail.) I would love to make more improvements and submit and newer draft.
I would not like to read this aloud; I would probably studder over, even, my own words. My reading is very choppy and has no rhythm.
You diden't really give me much to respond to.
I would not like to read this aloud; I would probably studder over, even, my own words. My reading is very choppy and has no rhythm.
You diden't really give me much to respond to.
Talk Back Assignment 1- Eating Disorders
First off, thank you for positive feedback. I have to admit that I didn't look for any cases where pop stars have influenced their fans (as far as trying to obtain a similar body.) This was mainly out of sloth, but I don't think any specific examples would have added much substance. I think it would have crowded the piece with detail rather than illustrate it and make it stronger. (okay, I might just be grasping at straws for an excuse for being lazy.)
I will go back and fix my typos.
I will go back and fix my typos.
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